As a hypnotist, as a change worker, or as an agent of change, I get an awful lot of people coming that wanna lose weight, that wanna get in better shape. They know what to eat, they know what not to eat, they know how to exercise, they know how to move their body, yet they do not do what they know.
They've tried it, all kinds of diets, all kind of regimes, but they've never actually got to that underlining software, the underlining problem that's caused them to be overweight in the first place, which always means, I like to use a metaphor, it's almost like putting a Band-Aid on a bullet wound. If you're always trying to treat the problem from the outside end of eating, "I've got to change my diet. Oh, I've got to change the way I exercise," and you don't deal with the reasons inside why you overeat when you're stressed, when you're sad, when you're happy, then you're gonna be on this roller-coaster of misery for an awful long time.
So when I see people for weight loss issues, it's always the inside-out approach, meaning we start in the inside, and then we make our way out to the outside. It's reverse, whatever kind of diet you can imagine out there. And today what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna share the four rules with you, that if you follow these four rules, you will take control of your weight for the rest of your life. [inaudible 00:02:09] me and a hypnotist, another hypnotist, a personal trainer, a dietician. If you're gonna follow these four rules coming out today, you just simply will control your weight once and for all.
And I'm gonna start saying weight release from now on. Now, occasionally, I might slip up and say weight loss, because I've been saying it for 30 some odd years now. So, occasionally, I'm gonna slip up, so I hope you forgive me for that, because I'm a human being. But it's about weight release, because, first of all, in our mind, our mind interprets everything very, very symbolic inside our minds. It's very, very literal, is what I'm trying to say here. So when you say weight loss, when you're thinking about loss in general, well, I lost my job, I lost my girlfriend, I lost my keys, I lost my wallet, I lost my house, I lost my dog, there aren't a lot of good positive emotions and positive associations linked to loss.
So if you're thinking about weight loss, your mind, your own conscious mind is often now caught into that association pattern of loss, loss, loss. Who wants to lose anything? Who wants to have a loss? None of us do. So I'm gonna start saying weight release from now on. Some of the language, the way we talk to ourselves, makes a very, very big difference.
Now, here's the thing. I had this story myself. I had weight issues for most of my life. I was even a personal trainer for a long period of time. I knew how to train. I knew how to eat. I'd gain weight and lose weight, gain weight and lose weight, lose 50 pounds, gain 50 pounds. As soon as I lost that 50 pounds, I was like, "Oh, great. Now, I can go back to eating the way that I did," until I became a fat bastard again. And this went on for a long, long time, and I was a trainer, and I was a fat trainer. I was a hypnotist, and I was a fat hypnotist.
And this pattern went on for such a long time in my life that one day I was just sick and tired of it, because I came to this realization, and the realization was this, I told myself that overeating, that by eating a bunch of sugar, by eating a bunch of carbohydrates, made me feel good until one day I didn't just buy into that. I tested that. I was feeling bad one day, so I'm like, "Okay, so I'm gonna eat this sugar. I'm gonna eat all these carbs, these white processed crap, and let me see if I feel better." And after a couple of sips of the Frappuccino, a couple of bites of the doughnut, you know what, I didn't feel any better.
This story that I've been telling myself my whole life, that overeating, that eating these carbohydrates made me feel better, it didn't. It was just a crock of shit. It didn't make me feel any better. It just made me fatter. And so that point that this revolution, revolution if you will, went off inside my head, that actually they don't make me feel better, they just anesthetized me, it just stopped me from feeling things that I didn't wanna feel.
So one day when I made this realization I'm like, "I don't know what it is that I don't wanna feel. I don't even need to know what it is, but I know it's dark, and I know it's scary, and I've been running from it for about 35 some odd years now. So, you know what, I'm gonna just wait. I'm gonna stand here and let it come for me, but whatever happens, I'm not gonna overeat this time. I'm gonna lay calm and let it do its worst, because I've been running, I'm sick and tired of running, and I'm sick and tired of having this problem. Hell, if I'm gonna go on and live my life and be any kind of success, then get me a bunch of new problems. I'm sick of these old problems."
So I remember I was walking around Downtown Toronto, and I think it was like one spring, one autumn, and I just felt that urge that I needed to eat, I needed to eat, I needed to eat a bunch of sugar. Now, I wasn't hungry. I mean, I was head hungry, but not tummy hungry. We'll get into that a bit later on. I thought I wanted to eat, but I wasn't physiologically hungry at all.
And I realized, I'm like, "Because I wanna run, I want to run from something, I want to hide from something." What was it? I didn't need to know. I didn't need to know what it was, because I was doing it to myself inside my mind, and I'm like, "Whatever this thing is, I'm just gonna sit here and let it come for me. I'm not gonna use my skills as a hypnotist to a change worker to try and make it disappear. I'm gonna let it come for me, and whatever it needs to do, I will let it do it, but I'm not gonna run from it."
And then this thick cloud, this thick sadness came over me, and it was horrible. It was very dark, and I don't know where it came from, but it was dark, and it was miserable, it was very scary, and real lonely. So I sat, and I felt like shit quite frankly for about 75 minutes, and then it just disappeared, and I didn't medicate myself to try and block it out. I took it, didn't know why it came, it came, and then it just lifted, and that 75 minutes seemed to last an eternity, but it did pass. And at that point I realized, whatever this feeling was, this sadness I've been running and running and overmedicating myself with food, telling myself I was hungry, telling myself to overeating, especially carbohydrates, made me feel good, it didn't. It never did.
I was just trying to run away from this feeling, and as soon as I accepted the feeling, I never had to do that again. And pretty much at that point all my eating issues stopped. True story. So when I'm working with people these issues, we never directly go after the diet or go after the training. We go after those deep issues that are inside, those malware, if you will, in your brain, and I'm not saying you're a computer, but those viruses that have been running through you that have been causing you to make bad decisions, to feel like shit, that's the things we go after, to delete the fire worms inside your mind so they don't affect you anymore.
Now, when it comes to the four rules of weight loss, I teach all my clients, I'm gonna teach it to you today, really, really easy. I didn't develop these. I didn't not come up with these. I just tend to use them. The four rules are very, very simple. I've taken them from Paul McKenna, a very famous hypnotist. I don't even think Paul invented them. I think they actually preexist Paul, but Paul made these concepts quite popular. And it's really, really simple, and I'm gonna unpackage these for you as well.
Stay tuned for the second part next week. Same Luke Time, Same Luke Channel!
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Luke Michael Howard Ph.D
Clinical Hypnotist Toronto